Remember when your teacher would pull you aside and say “you’re failing this class, you need to do better.” (okay, maybe that was me not you, but go with me here).
Wasn’t it the most sinking feeling? It always felt like judgement upon your head or even worst, you were a failure.
Now you’re an adult with adult responsibilities. You’re even responsible for a few little people and you constantly hear that voice “You’re failing. . . “
But are you really, though? I mean, you’re still here right? You’ve got a job, a family? You pay your bills, taxes and even manage to take a vacation every now and then, right?
Then why do you keep hearing that voice?
If you were failing you’d be . . . well, not alive anymore I think. Who’d want to hire a failure? Who’d want to join lives with a failure, let alone have kids? Who’d want to hang out with a failure. . . would you?
The illusion of failure
The fear of failure is what keeps you “controlled”. The fear that you might “do it wrong” so why try is what keeps you in want.
Here’s a secret. Failure is an illusion. You only see it if you choose to look at it.
Let’s say someone is trying to create the worlds first widget. No one knows, so no one’s around to tell them how it’s going. So, they work on it and miss their mark over and over again. Finally, on their two hundredth try their widget does exactly what they imagined it would. Success!!
Do you think they look at the one hundred and ninety nine other tries as failures? I’m thinking no. Why? Because no one was there to tell them they were failing. Because every time they tried, they learned something new. Because they didn’t look at failure as a viable option
Again: Because every time they tried they learned something new.
Failure is an illusion. It’s a story we tell ourselves because it’s a story that’s been told to us.
Try and learn
Instead of saying we tried and failed, what if we said we “tried and learned”? We’ve all heard about Thomas Edison‘s famous line “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” He did not see or look at failure, so he succeeded!
Why are we ready to allow the illusion of failure to derail our efforts? Maybe if we didn’t see anything as failing we’d be more successful in pursuing our dreams.
The next time you’re starting a new project or venture:
- Do it on your own terms
- Quiet your negative mind
- Be bold
- Remember you’re learning at every turn
Let’s go out and erase failure. Who needs it anyway?